OBs...do they really care?

Today I had my latest OB appointment. I was all set to get scheduled for an induction. I had my big girl pants on and was ready to say, "I'm not leaving with a date!" The nurse backed me up on this, and when the doctor came in, I said "I need to get something scheduled, I can't go any longer. My family needs me, and I need to have this baby before she's to big to come out on her own." Then he said the unthinkable..."Overlake (my hospital) has a new policy. No inductions before 41 weeks."

I almost started crying right then and there. As I type this I'm wondering if I shouldn't call the hospital to ask if this is true. Maybe he wants me to have a c-section so he can get paid more. NO, NO! I've always trusted my doctors. Right now though, I HATE that I have this new guy and not my old guy. Dr. Woods...he's the man. What a great OB. He induced me at 38 weeks with both my boys, and I had told my new guy this around my 20 week appointment and he said that we shouldn't have any issue doing what has worked the past two times. So, I wonder, when did this 41 week policy start? I think I will call.

Anyway, He says, "Well, how about we strip your membranes to see if we can get things going." That scared the crap out of me. I've never GONE into labor, I've always had it chemically induced. I wanted to be on the hospital bed when my water broke, not at home in MY bed. But wouldn't you know it, this baby is so far up there, he couldn't even do that for me. I am a measly 2cm dilated, which I can't stand to hear, since I was 4 and 70% with Middle by now. I could feel the hot tears welling up, and I was trying to keep those big girl pants on and not cry in front of the doctor. He says, "well, we'll see you next week then." and leaves and I let the flood gates open. Another week. ANOTHER FREAKIN' WEEK! I've never gone past 38 weeks. This baby is going to be huge, I will need a c-section to get her out, my parents come on Friday and stay until the 13th, I NEED to get this done NOW!

I HATE HATE HATE not being in control of this situation. I wanted to be induced on Thursday and spend the whole trip with my parents NOT pregnant, so that I could recover as much as possible while I had help and, you know, have a glass of wine with my mom for the first time in two years! Is that so wrong? Is it to much to ask that I actually have an enjoyable visit with my parents for once where I'm not sick, tired, and pissed off because I'm pregnant? Is it to much to ask that this she-beast be born now so that I can get my body back and actually be a wife to my husband and a mother to my kids again? its very possible that nothing will get scheduled until the week of the 13th, which is when my parents leave. What a freakin' waste of a trip.

I'll tell you what. This whole day has made it even more clear...CRYSTAL clear that I never want to be pregnant again. If anything I can take solace in the fact that I will never have a vacation, visit, or day ruined by the fact that I am pregnant. It is nice to at least know this. I hate being pregnant...I love my kids, I HATE being pregnant. NEVER AGAIN!

...And I'm Still Pregnant

Yesterday we had some sunny weather. Not overly warm, but it was still nice not being soaked with rain. Because of this nice break, we all waited outside for the bus to pick up Eldest for pre-school. We sat on the porch talking about school, and riding the bus, and baby sister, and then the bus came...and WENT! I couldn't believe it! This had never happened before! He passed right by our house and went about a block up to a house that is painted a similar color. I turned to Eldest and said "RUN!!!!" I scooped up Middle and ran down the block. I must have looked so ridiculous! 9 months pregnant with a 40 lbs toddler in my arms running as fast as I could screaming "WAIT! YOU WENT TO THE WRONG HOUSE!!" and waving my hands wildly as I kept telling Eldest to run faster. We got about 3 feet from the back of the bus when he pulled away and drove off. He never saw us waving or running, or heard us screaming.

Eldest was an instant puddle of tears. He loves the bus and he was so upset that he missed it. I looked at him, breathing like I had just run a marathon and said "RUN! BACK TO THE HOUSE NOW!!" We ran back to the house, and I burst in the door and went straight for the phone. I dialed the bus barn and when the guy answered I said "Bus went to the wrong house, I NEED the bus to come back! HELP ME!!" He called the driver and thankfully he came back around to pick up Eldest. Crisis averted.

Sometimes I wonder how this crap happens to me! I mean, we were right in front of the house waiting for the bus! He's NEVER missed our house before. I just don't get it!

Whats more...even after running two blocks with a 40 lbs kid in my arms I am still very much pregnant! What the HECK!

Its Official, I'm OVER IT!

I am 37 weeks. "Full Term" according to most doctors. Up until this week I was uncomfortable, but still able to perform most tasks (like putting on my own shoes). Bending over to pick stuff up wasn't all that great, but I could do it or get Eldest to help if need be. This week, its just horrible. I'm convinced she's bigger than both boys and I am getting myself phsyched up about going to the doctor tomorrow. I really want...no, I NEED to hear that I've progressed. That all the nesting I've been doing this past week has paid off! I need to hear at least 2cm or I think I'll cry. I do think I'll beg for an U/S to check size. Then I worry they'll induce without having progressed any because she's so big, and I'll end up with a c-section. The anxiety of not knowing how this will all play out is really keeping me up at night! I just want her OUT! I can't stand being this fat or, this uncomofortable anymore. I want my body back and let me tell you what, I'm keeping it for myself from here on out. WE ARE DONE with kiddos. No more. I'm already dreaming of the day when she turns 3! By then she'll be potty trained, old enough for pre-school, and talking to me!

For Real?

So, today was a BIG nesting day for me. I'm talking MAJOR cleaning here...the GARAGE! I love organizing my garage. I think I get that from my dad, and for weeks I've been itchin' to do it, but didn't think I could because of my growing belly. But today the weather was above 50, the sun was out (for a brief time) and I said "LETS DO IT!" The boys were thrilled to find toys they hadn't seen since last summer, and I pulled it all out. Porch swing, deck chairs, the hose...everything. I also took the time to organize my work bench which was a complete disaster area. Now, all that's left is getting rid of Mt. Trashmore in the middle, and I'll leave that up to Rob. If I thought I could handle four or five trips to the dump, I would have done it today, but that gets costly, and Rob can do it in just a couple trips with no one else in the car with him. I can't wait. It will free up lots more space and allow me to get in there and photograph all the things I want to sell on Craig's List!

So, anyway, with clear paths to each corner of the garage, I knew we would have no trouble getting out the last few baby items. You know, like the bouncer seats, play mats, and most importantly the car seat/bases. We've used the same infant seat since Eldest was born, and research showed its good for 6 years. Since he's 4, we figure baby girl won't care if she's in a blue car seat. Its saving her parents money. We find everything but the car seat pretty easily. I started to get nervous. I had a pretty clear memory of putting it in a storage bin, but which one? Before Rob started in on the 10 or so bins piled on top of each within the storage area above the door to the garage, he asked about a few that were stacked in the corner. Most of the bins in our garage are filled with Rob's crap. I had always assumed those were his stuff, but he wanted to check them since it meant not having to get up on the ladder again. Sure enough, the first bin had the car seat in it....YAY! The second bin was labeled "Maternity Clothes." Rob opened it and sure enough, it was full of Maternity clothes...WHOA, wait a minute! MATERNITY CLOTHES? WTF? When we looked in the garage MONTHS ago (9 months to be exact) for these clothes I found one measly box and that was it. I swore up and down to him that there was more, but we couldn't find it and I never thought to check his "junk storage bin pile". DAMN IT. Now I have what, like 3 weeks left? I had half a mind to go through that stuff and get out some things so I could wear more than the three black shirts and one pair of Jeans I have left, but then I decided it wasn't worth it. But really, of all the times to find the mother load of maternity clothes...3 weeks before she comes. Good Lord.

The 3rd bin had the bases and the car seat attachment for the stroller. I am in the process of cleaning everything now, and once that is done, we will be READY. Tomorrow Rob installs the base for the car seat so I can get a sense of what our seating arrangement in the car will be like. Eldest has it in his head that he'll sit between Middle and Baby girl, which would be great, because he could keep good tabs on both of them for me, but I just don't know if there will be room. We'll see!

Here are some photos of her nursery. I put the final touches on it yesterday and am so happy with how it looks. I didn't take nearly this much time on the boys baby rooms!

Time Stand Still

Good Lord, what a freakin' week and its only Wednesday. Monday was by far the worst hell I've ever experienced as a pregnant woman. I wish I had blogged about it then so we could make today and "update", but when Rob got home, I clocked out!

I don't know if Eldest was tired, hungry, growing, or if he is sensing the impending change in our household, but he turned into a holy terror on Monday. We started the day off great! Everyone happy, and excited about going to sports sampler, school & swimming. We got in the car and listened to eldest favorite song all the way there (FYI, its Paradies City by GNR...I know cool right?). We get there and he's talking about baseball and running into the community center and then its like we walked into some alternate universe! When we got into the building he did a 180 on me and refused to participate. Nothing I did, said, or threatened would change his mind, and I was fed up, so I put his coat back on and started the long walk across the gym to the exit. Middle holding my hand and Eldest trying to pull me down by my diaper bag strap screaming as loud as possible "NOOOOO, NOOOO, NOOOO!" He did this all the way to the car and I kept my cool, just kept walking and ignored the stares from moms and others trying to enjoy their morning at the community center. We get to the car and I toss him in and shut the door so he can't get out then put his brother in his car seat, I get into the front seat and he immediately starts assulting me from the back, so I get out and get in back with him and start giving him the riot act. We may as well have been two 4 year olds fighting because I was just as loud as he was and I can only imagine what people were thinking as they passed by my car. After about 20 minutes of him screaming about wanting to play baseball and me screaming back about how class was over and he blew it, I calmed down and told him we were leaving and to get his seat belt on. Then I realized the child locks were on and I couldn't get out from the back seat so my big, fat, butt had to climb between the two front seats to get behind the wheel. What a morning. I didn't talk to him the whole way home. I didn't talk to him until lunch was ready and by then we were calm and he totally responded to everything. He told me what he did wrong, how he would behave next time and apologized. We were back in our universe again. He got on the bus for school and Middle and I took a well deserved nap.

Now, after his performance that AM I told him we would NOT be going to swimming because I wasn't about to deal with him and Logan in that hot building like I had before. But when he got home from school he was in a good mood, and he told me he would like to go, so I said "sure, let's go. You can show me how you know how to behave." WRONG! With only 5 minutes left in class he refused to let the teacher help him with his kicking, so she sat him out and he wasn't allowed to participate in jump time. I was holding him back from jumping in the pool trying to talk to him while Middle ran away to the front lobby. I had to pick up Eldest over my shoulder (soaking wet), find Middle, and then get them both into the locker room (which is 200 degrees) and force getting Eldest dressed. Luckily I got a lot more sympathy in the locker room, even though Eldest SCREAMED bloody murder the whole time we were in there. A friend offered to help and a nice grandmother told me "things will get better". I have no shame in admitting that I cried on the way home. Basically because I felt so trapped! I wanted nothing more than to call my mother up and say "COME HELP ME!" and knowing she couldn't just come and help me made me so sad.

But, I'm over it. That was Monday, today is Wednesday! Today we got to try both activities over and I'm happy to report that Eldest did GREAT. Sure, he could listen better at swimming, but he didn't get sat out, so I call that a victory and he was beyond good at Sports Sampler. He played Basketball today and I was impressed with his skills. The key, I got a friend to watch Middle while I took him to swimming, which really gave me a good break, and also allowed me to watch him while in the pool and give him "the look" when he was out of line. Three more swim lessons and one more sports sampler until its over. Can't wait. After that, swimming will be on Saturdays and Rob will take him!

Other than that, nothing new to report. I did go to the OB today and I'm closed up tighter that Fort Knox, so this baby girl is not interested in coming out anytime soon. I realize having her "in" is better, but if only having her "in" didn't mean I was an imobile cow. If I could move around easily and roll over in bed without causing small earthquakes in my house than life would be great! I've noticed in the last week time has really come to a hault. I swear I watch the clock and see the second hand go backwards. Funny, time was flying by until now. I have just under 3 weeks before my official due date...and it really couldn't seem farther away! I'm ready to get this party started!!!

Happy St. Patrick's Day

Love Jib Jab!!

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Me Time...

That's something I won't be getting much of come April. I'm not upset about it, and the few minutes I do get will be precious to me. To make them all last longer, I have decided to indulge myself in little things, such as this great fabric softener! If my clothes smell good, I smell good, and I feel good!


If you're interested in trying this as well, click on the "$2.00 Coupon" in the margin on the right and enjoy!

Weather or not...I care

I do care, the weather has a lot to do with my mood, and what's unfortunate is that I had to move to a place where the weather sucks over half the year to realize this. My friends are getting tired of the yearly rant about how crappy the weather is here. Not very many of them are from here, so I find it hard to believe that they LOVE it, but regardless, I rant on and on about how I can't take it anymore, how I'm over it, how I would like this to just STOP, and I'm not so sorry to say those rants won't end so long as it's still snowing in March, and my heat is on until June.

Growing up in the SE, I suppose I got spoiled by the fact that our Spring actually started in SPRING! next Friday is the first day of Spring and today, on the news, our weather man let everyone know it is going to SNOW yet again. Snow. I have grown to H-A-T-E snow. Everyone thinks its so magical. Its not. Its a death trap. You can't drive anywhere, and even if you could, all your activities are canceled due to "weather conditions". So you end up being stuck in your house because its to damn cold to go outside, and you have NOTHING to wear outside anyway because you're 8 months pregnant. That last one may just be a current issue, but it is one that I deal with.

Today was so nice. Mid 50s nice breeze. This is what I expect mid-March, and just to torture myself a bit, I looked up what the weather was like in Richmond, VA & Charlotte, NC and although its chilly today and tomorrow (like here), it will be in the mid 60s/70s by the end of the week. THAT is what I want. THAT is what I need! We've been dealing with rain since September. So, let's do the math. If the bad weather starts in September and ends in June (which it doesn't always do...last year July was cold as hell and August wasn't that much better), then we're talking at least 9 months of shitty weather and only 3 months (IF THAT) of weather that is tolerable. When you put it like that, who in the hell would want to live out here??? No wonder those who can afford it leave this place for months at a time in the winter. Curse you Bill Gates for building your empire in the Mordor of the US!

Tomorrow is the St. Patrick's Day Dash in our neighborhood and I signed up to walk it. Its a 5K, not long, but I won't do it if its blowing wind and rain and less than 50 degrees out. Guess what, there's a 100% chance of rain here tomorrow according to weather.com. 100%!! Reading that was like reading, "Yes, Mother Nature is going to take a piss all over your day tomorrow. Have fun!"

So, to those who grew up in the great state of WA, I have no idea how you survived it. To those who have moved here and fooled yourself into loving this crap, more power to you. Finally, to those like me, take my advice, don't check places you know will be warm on weather.com because it will just piss you off even more.

Belly Bandit!

I got my Belly Bandit in the mail today and I am so thrilled to have it. For those who don't know, the Belly Bandit is one of many compression bands out on the market these days. They are used by women who have just given birth to help support the stomach muscles and the organs inside. I didn't know about compression bands, or wrapping with my first two and I sure do wish I had.

I didn't get the Belly Bandit to lose weight faster. That will only happen if I diet and exercise properly, but I did get it to help shape my body after this baby. Let's face it, this is my 3rd baby, and my second baby in less than 2 years. My body barely stopped looking pregnant after I had Middle. I'm hoping the Belly Bandit will help in that regard, and also help with the back aches we moms get right after birth due to the fact that we have no ab muscles helping us out and huge boobs that probably each weight five pounds when full (not a nice image, but a true fact nonetheless).

So, once I have the baby, I'll be chronicling my use of the Belly Bandit on the blog for those that may be interested in using this after they have a baby. We'll see how well it works (if at all). Pictures and everything...be ready!!

p.s. - wouldn't it be super if they made a "chin bandit"? I certainly would use that no matter how ridiculous it looked!!

Updates...

SWIMMING: things have gotten MUCH better in this arena. Eldest is listening a little better each time and I'm able to keep Middle engaged long enough to keep him from jumping into the pool. Its still utterly exhuasting, but we haven't had to leave in just the bathing suit since that first night...SCORE!

One funny note on swimming though, we went this past Wednesday and the pool was in the process of being shut down due to "contamination". A few thoughts went through my head when I heard this: 1) The mental picture of a turd floating through the pool like a Baby Ruth bar, 2) relishing the fact that my child (for once) didn't cause this to happen, and 3) the fit I was about to endure because Eldest's beloved activity was canceled. We never found out why the pool had to be closed, and my delight in my child not causing the event was somewhat dampened by the huge fit thrown back to the car about not getting to swim. For some reason he can't get it through his head that I can't do anything about a contaminated pool.

BABY: I managed to gain five pounds in two weeks. I wasn't all that surprised considering I've been averaging a box of girl scout cookies a day. Thankfully yesterday I did myself a favor and at the last of them so this wouldn't happen any longer (HA). Weight gain is a necessary evil of pregnancy and my least favorite part (as stated in pervious posts), but we're almost done!

I was delighted to find out that baby girl is head down and measuring 2 weeks ahead. These are the same stats given to me when my boys were around 34 weeks, which put my fears of C-section to rest. I realize anything could still happen, but I'm glad I don't have the anxiety of a scheduled c-section looming over me the next few weeks. And weeks it is. My due date on my chart happens to be April 7th, so if I were induced a week early (as per my other two), I could have this baby anytime between March 30th and April 2nd. My hope is we'll be able to schedule this induction for the 3rd, since my mom and dad will be here, but if its the 30th, so be it! We'll live for those first few days!

WEATHER: The weather here sucks. Period. End of story.